In memoriam

Cross-posted from my mom's blog.

Tate O'Connor
March, 1997 - February 2, 2011

I'd like to sit here and write a tribute to our dog, Tate, who passed away yesterday. But I find I don't know where to start... How do I condense fourteen years of experiences into a few paragraphs? So I suppose I'll just ramble a bit...

She came into our home from a shelter, one of seven boxer/hound siblings. We don't know exactly how many weeks old she was, because the shelter and the vet disagreed on her age. So, we observed her birthday somewhere around the middle of March.

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The photo above is Tate with her adopted brother Michael, in the crate she used for most of her life. She loved her crate, and spent most of her time in there as she got older, snoozing. Even when we passed that particular crate down to Moya, Tate still got into it whenever she had the chance. Gosh, she looks so little there.

Tate might technically have been my dog, but she took particular interest in James. They were puppies together, after all. James was just six years old when we got Tate. During the time when James was involved in Boy Scouts, and went camping often, Tate would refuse to eat until James got home. She'd go two or three days without eating a single bite. Eventually we realized that if James explained to her that he would be gone a certain number of days but he'd be back, she'd be fine while he was gone and wouldn't hunger strike.

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She was good about letting us dress her up, too. Not that we did it often, but she'd let us. She's wearing the decorations from a luau party here, and we imagine she's singing "Tiny Bubbles" and pretending she's on stage with Don Ho.

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We moved to Alaska when Tate was twelve years old. Boxers average out at about 10 years old, so even though she's a mixed breed, I didn't really think she'd survive the move. But she not only survived, she came through with flying colors, crossing America top to bottom, the Canada-USA border twice, and settling into Alaskan living as if it was no big deal. Here she is at a hotel along the way, obviously happy with her "globetrotting."

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Shortly after moving here, though, Tate began to show her age, and we brought home two new sisters for her to interact with and give her something new to occupy her days, rather than just lay around and sleep. That plan didn't work out quite like we'd hoped. The new sisters each formed their own largely separate existences, and Tate went back to sleeping her days away.

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Moya became a thorn in Tate's side, the older the two became. But it wasn't all bad.

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I love this picture. A photo bomb from Tate on the way to the kennel in Sterling, the first time James flew to Pennsylvania for college.

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Tate usually didn't mind the snow, but I adore the put-upon look she's giving me on this particular snowy day.

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Many a time, as Tate grew older, weaker, and less healthy, we debated if this was Her Time. But our decision was that as long as she seemed happy, we'd let her continue, but if her health deteriorated too far, there would be no heroic measures. Her demeanor was usually one of contentedness if not happiness, and some days she seemed to have no clue about anything, just a generally senile outlook of being happy no matter what. Health issues restricted her to the downstairs nearly all the time, as the incontinence got worse and her hips got weaker and falls on the stairs increased.

But still she smiled and was glad for the times she got to come upstairs and be part of the pack, or sleep in her beloved old crate instead of her new one.

Then, yesterday, we knew things had changed. She'd been off her food for a couple days, which was highly unusual in itself. She was reluctant to stand, reluctant to walk when she did stand, and even laid down in the snow rather than walk into the yard to potty. She couldn't control herself and made some messes. She looked a bit scared and distressed. Not the happy-go-lucky she normally was.

It was time.

James called and talked to her on the phone and said his goodbye to her. She managed a last meal of favorite foods that had been off limits due to her sensitive stomach - marshmallows, leftover steak, and the oh-so-coveted rawhide treat. Jim carried her upstairs and she spent her last afternoon amongst the family, laying by her water bowl.

She died in my arms, with Jim at our side, before she had a chance to realize there was anything unusual about this trip to the vet. We petted her and told her she was a good dog. We buried her on the bluff overlooking the lake, wrapped in a blanket Jim's grandmother made, with her face to the rising sun and the view over the water.

She was steadfast, loyal, and even-keeled, and she was a good dog for sure. The house is emptier without her. We loved her.

And she is missed.

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~~~~~

We knew before I left for this semester that I probably wouldn't see her again after we boarded everyone for our trip to Anchorage. Around 3:00 yesterday, 11:00 AK time, I got two urgent facebook messages from my parents. I was at a friend's dorm taking pictures at the time, so they had been there for a few minutes before I noticed them. I had opened the internet to update Photoshop, so thank you Wes for giving me a PEF file I couldn't handle.
I excused myself and went to the stairwell, where I called home and got the details. I said goodbye, presumably while she was upstairs, and I could hear Moya in the background. I wish I had had more to say, but what do you say to someone you've known nearly as long as you can remember? Like Mom said, it's hard to condense 14 years into something brief on the spot.

I didn't cry much initially, and that surprised me. On the one hand, I was grateful; breaking into tears in a freshman dorm would hardly be a good thing. On the other, I was worried; I thought I would be feeling more. After the fact, it was more of an uneasy feeling of being at peace, knowing what was coming. At 6:40, shortly after returning from dinner, I got the message via facebook that the deed had been done. Therefore, she passed away around 2:00 local time. Then I cried and let it out. Heck, I'm crying now. I went down after I was done and stopped by to see how the people in Ket Rec were doing; I needed a bit of company and I got it.

This was posted originally about an hour ago, which is when I got the details from the part after I called home. Hannah, who was sitting next to me, saw and read it with me (I was waiting for the OSG meeting to start).

It will be some time before I'll be at piece with her absence. She's one less face that will greet me when I get home at break.

Tate, I'm sorry that I didn't pay more attention to you in your last few months, sorry that you got ignored because you couldn't come out of your bed without making a mess on the floor, sorry that your life was unfair near the end because you couldn't handle or couldn't have the things that made you happy. I'm sorry that you got ignored because my heart was being stolen by another dog who liked to push you down the stairs. Some of this stuff was unavoidable, but I'm genuinely sorry for that last part; it was selfish of me, and I should have tried to spend more time with you when I had the chance. It genuinely feels like we grew apart during those last months, and that shouldn't have happened. I wish I could fix it, but that chance is gone now. The best I can do is not make that mistake again.

That said, I'm glad you could share your journey with us, with me. I enjoyed sharing mine with you. Now that we've parted ways, your memory will live on.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9UInUxCxhU

Regarding Winterfeast, pt 1: preparations

Warning: I fail at names. If I don't remember your name, it's not that I don't like you. I forget *everybody's* name.

Winterfeast was good. I went on the evening cooking crew after Anime, and we went to the apartments to chop things.
Carl and Susanna had just joined us for that evening, so basically none of it made sense, but they both seemed to like it. It's the sort of thing that's really entertaining, provided you leave your left brain at the door.

We couldn't find the dates for the Lombard anywhere, and the apartment was not intended for more than one or two people cooking/working at a time. We had four or five going at any one time. I spent most of the evening dicing potatoes, another guy made pasty crusts, and Susanna chopped dried fruit (which was really annoying, since the fruit stuck to the knife). Then we kicked back and relaxed with the movie and Twilight reading.

I went to bed at 2:00, then got up in the late morning, remembered winterfeast was today after checking my email leisurely, and headed down to Ketler kitchen as fast as I could. That was the biggest cooking area available, and we were using it for the pork roasts. We then headed down to the apartments to do the bulk of the cooking.

While I stepped out for lunch (we were waiting on potatoes to cook, which would take a lot of time and tie up all both of our big pots) they finished cooking the potatoes and making pasty filling: potato, cheese, onion, and some other stuff. I pretty much stuck to pasties for the rest of the day. Another guy and I (gah, can't remember his name even though I knew it at the time) assembled them all, then spent a bunch of time baking them.

Then came the next big task, once everything was cooked: moving everything. Now, for those of you who haven't seen the campus, it has two sections: upper and lower. Upper campus has the academic buildings, dining halls, and dorms. Lower campus has the athletic fields and apartments. Now, the apartments are on the absolute corner of lower campus - on main street, in fact. Also, "upper" and "lower" aren't just directional conventions. upper campus is a good bit higher than lower campus, and the apartment was on the fourth floor. Between us, it took two or three trips max. But what did I get the second trip, but nearly all of the juice for the punch? That's a lot of juice. Thank you to the visiting alum who got a pair of the larger bottles for me. I need to go out and walk more.

What made it nice is that it was getting warm enough for T-shirts, and it was sunny to boot. That meant that I forgot my coat in the apartment. By the time I realized, it was too late to go get it. This means I did not take pictures, because my camera was in my coat pocket.

After getting the bulk of the food there, it was time for the pork. Me and a couple others spent the next fifteen minutes running back and forth with trays of meat (which smelled REALLY GOOD). Then it was finally time to begin.

Regarding tests

My first clump of tests just came up this week.

Monday: Foundations of Econ
Wednesday: Principles of Microeconomics
Thursday: Introduction to Psychology

I got the grade back on the first one; I made a 94, having misinterpreted one question and gotten partial credit for another.
I just took the second test; it was similar to the first one in many respects, this being the beginning of the course before the two classes diverge a whole lot. This one was more intensive, though. I think I still did well.

I've heard frightening stories about the philosophy tests for this professor. What I've been able to confirm so far are true. That the study guide is a disorganized, wall-of-text nightmare is all I will say. This class is my nemesis.

Also, happy Chinese New Year. a Chinese group has a booth here in the SAC, with some cool stuff about Chinese characters, Chinese chess, and fried rice. You wouldn't believe how hard it is to get an Asian dish with proper sticky rice around here - I haven't seen it in the dining hall for the better part of a month, and they didn't seem to use it here. It was still good, though.




Off to get back on the network (somebody changed the password on me) and study for Philosophy.

Regarding Maternal Hints ;)

Wait, I have a blog?

Anyway, not too much has been bloggable, except I have a cluster of tests. As of 4:00 today, it will be two down, and the horrible one to go. Class in 20, so I'll squeeze a post in.

So here's some random pictures:
Happy sidewalk gum says hai.


Dr. Hulsmann, who I've gotten the chance to talk with one on one, and went to his lecture on the national debt.


Pocky, in its natural habitat.


And a little art project:

Regarding pictures

A breakfast at MAP. I mangled my waffle when I got it out, but it still tasted really good. They've got a pair of wafflemakers there, so you can make gigantic Belgian waffles fresh. It's pretty awesome. Not a lot of pictures have turned out, since they were mostly taken in the dark.

Me at the bowling alley. Yay for blurry. Thanks to Peter for taking the pic.

On the bench: Eric (I think), Kevin (in the sports team T-shirt), and Jesse (blurry, in the white shirt). Rachel is standing at the table. I had one of her, but it didn't turn out. No really, it didn't turn out.

I'm sorry about the layout. A necessary dialog box isn't showing up.

Regarding Dr. Ritenour

Dr. Ritenour is awesome. You know you've got something when his syllabus says "Credit hours: The same number it takes to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop." He also throws in pop culture references, and is generally great. I wish I had him in the morning, because he loves to shout. Not in a bad way, but there is no way in heck that you're falling asleep in his class.

His quizzes are daily, but our first one was easy, and he says the others are just like it. They're basically just to make sure you did the reading, so they're not hard.

He also has bow tie friday, where men are encouraged to wear bow-ties. I made a duct tape one after dinner. I would send pictures, but my ability to upload is a bit compromised. I think I'll enjoy his classes.

Regarding safe travels

Please pray for Mom and Dad, who are flying back to AK (Alaska, not Arkansas coughcough) tomorrow morning while I am at class. Safe journeys, and good flight to both of you!